The spirit is willing but the flesh is weak. I have the curiosity and the desire to visit the Holy Land. When I knew that previously Landings had ever organised such trip, I wondered when it would happen again. My prayer has been answered as there will be one this year. However when it was announced, I started to have second thoughts because of the cost, time (whether my boss would allow me to take leave since it will be close to the usual end of year appraisal periods) and visa.
Initially I did not my name, not even to the 'discerning' list, but I still attended the online briefing session. After seeing some photos of the places from the previous trip, all my touristy desires disappeared. Honestly, the places are not pretty and it is like going to some kampong. That is actually not a bad thing since I will not be to preoccupied with taking photos and I can have the pilgrim mindset, rather than a tourist mindset.
On the other side, I had new worry after seeing those attending the briefing. I hardly know any of them and there are some that I prefer to avoid. Hence, who would I be sharing room with if I were to go? And similar to the trip that my parents had before COVID, generally people who are interested to go to the Holy Land are the older people. It is true to the notion that we prefer to have fun and go to touristy destination when we are young. We only start thinking about pilgrimage when we are nearer to the end of life. By then the body may already be old and sick and may not be the best for the terrain there. It got me thinking that I should go while my body is still able. A part of me also felt regretful that I did not join my parents a few years ago and that would have been my last trip with my dad.
In addition, as part of the pilgrimage experience, everyone is expected to contribute in the things that will be required or we will do such as daily Mass, sharing, reflections, publications. Seeing the lack of young people and males, perhaps I would have the chance to be an altar server? Hahaha.. That is something I never experience and it will be another once-in-a-lifetime experience on top of the pilgrimage itself.
Before I went on leave, I decided to try my luck asking my boss if I would be allowed to take leave during the period. I was surprised that my boss was so excited and encouraged me to go while I have the opportunity since it is not a typical tourist place that people would go. Wow, even God helps to clear this obstacle.
During this holiday doing nothing at home, I make up my mind that the cost is not an issue. I will earn back the money but the opportunity may not come again. While yes it is much more expensive than what my parents paid for their trip, it is not surprising since all the air tickets this year are still so expensive regardless of the destination.
The biggest bug bear is the visa application, especially with one of the required documents which I don't know how to get: an invitation letter from someone in Israel. I decided to ask the person organising and he shared not to worry since there were Indonesians who joined the trip before. The travel agency organising this will get the letter. Since Singaporeans also require visa to Jordan, that will be taken care for the whole group. With that, the last of my worries are settled. I decided to go and I am glad that it is not too late for me and I am still within the quota of 30 people.
So for now, all that I can do is praying so that I can get my visa, I can have a good roommate and I can have memorable and God-filled experience there, especially if I really have a chance to be an altar server. Hehe.. I have done playing music, being a lector, and writing bulletins so these 'areas of contributions' are not that exciting for me.
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