Nursing rotation

I had a rotation today and it was really an eye-opener. I realised on how worthless my profession is in the healthcare. Well, as much as the pharmacists claim to be drug expert bla bla bla, I just have to be honest to say they are all bullshitters with no brain to "market" themselves in the healthcare "industries".

Some nurses are actually running clinics and doing counselling that my lecturers always promote in classes. Come on! These nurses took 30-40minutes per patient to describe lifestyle modification for diabetes,  hypertension, and cholesterol, complete with all the nice diagrams and booklets and pamphlets. No wonder by the time the patients reach the pharmacy, they are no longer interested to hear the same information being repeated in a much crappyer and shittier way. How to inform how to take medicine + ask and explain about side effects + lifestyle modification in 1/10 of the time that the nurses need?

My gripe is that why don't the pharmacists "snatch" these roles in the first place! So lame that only "now" they want to run whatever clinics while from the start these whole thing can be easily within their reach. No offence to the nurses but I think pharmacists are in better place because pharmacists can titrate medicine or recommend OTC/P-items if patient is unwell on that day. That will save patient's time rather than the nurse refer them to see doctor to get simple cold-cough-medicine and make the patient wait for another 1/2-1 hour for the doctor.

Today there was someone who got a heart attack and too bad pharmacists are not usually involved in emergency eh? I honestly don't know the proper treatment ba but this person was given oxygen. Only after like 15-20mins later than he was given GTN. I thought GTN should be the first thing in mind in case of angina?? From what I learnt at school, in case of angina, patient is advised to take GTN, if after the 2nd dose 5mins later it is still not okay, then call for ambulance. So it caught me by surprise today. And after that, they were discussing whether to give aspirin 100mg or not. They were worried that patient took it already and if he was given again, that would be a double dose. I don't think it was a problem actually. For pain or fever, one aspirin tablet is 500mg so what's the big deal of 100+100mg now? And if it is to be used for the blood thinning effects, will it come into effect that fast to do something about the angina?? I don't know! But I think pharmacists will know better.

So please wake up pharmacists! Stop being so proud and your own small world about you being the "drug experts". Look as how the public looks upon us. We are just invisible and useless because our patient contact/care sucks to the core. Stop being so proud about drugs and look out the reality.  What matters most is how people value us. Learn to better market yourself  and service as drug experts instead. After that people will know and respect and higher pay will follow.

One last interesting observation was that patients were addressing the immunisation nurses as "doctors". A nurse said "They think nurses are doctors. Then they think the health assistants and people at registration/payment counters are nurses. So when they feedback that doctors are good and nurses are rude, I wonder whether they have the correct people in mind.". I just wonder where is "pharmacists" in public mind then.. Haha..

Oh well eventually, we will have to help ourselves.. But in the near future, I don't see that happening. From my class, I can see how most people are still in their schizophrenic little world where pharmacists are undervalued and unappreciated drug experts. Where it is public fault for being not appreciative instead of realising that public just doesn't see our value. Too make matters worse, we are too busy trying to grab the doctors' pie and happily giving away ours to the nurses. The end result is: we have the smallest pie. And that explains the current state of pharmacy profession today.

First it was sore throat..

Now it becomes flu-like..

Then come the stupid email about the "graduands list" crap.. It just made me burn with anger, hatred, and jealousy. Yeah I wish 'All the worst' to that person.. Not that it makes me feel better anyway..

And I start to feel emo.. I hate doing my project.. I cannot foresee the end-point so it is hard for me to do/say/thing something constructive about it. The supervisor is... erm.. well I wish I get someone better.. 

And I start to feel sad, stupid, inadequate, dumb, idiotic.. I am glad that my preceptor is nice and "spoonfeeds" me. I cannot imagine if I am in hospital.. All that was asked of me I could not answer.. It seems that it was useless to actually do reading beforehand since school equipped me with shit only :(

Come to think of it.. perhaps it is a miracle.. or an accident.. that with an idiotic brain of mind, I still graduate with first class honours.. Although I barely made it.. Thank goodness I am out of school. I don't hate it. I FUCKING HATE IT!

Another week had passed again. It was still as good as the first week :) I did a few mistakes like packing, keying, and not intervening. I am glad that my preceptor was very understanding and just laughed it all for the mistakes I did while one of the PTs was visibly irritated, which made me irritated too! Gosh.. come on! I am new.. of course I will do mistakes. Even for the experienced ones they all also do mistakes and that's why we work in a team to cover one another's backside mah!

I think I suck in capturing/keying but I am more or less okay for checking. Caught a few packing errors and I tried not to be irritated. Lol.. Got one girl which is kinda irritating though. She always slacks try to avoid packing. Then the way she packs is very weird. The loose tablets are always akwardly placed  like squeezed in between the nicer ones and sometimes I mistook them for mistake. Paiseh haha...

I am kinda glad for the mini-reunion with the collection of academic gown and pre-reg opening ceremony yesterday. Haha.. After some time, my feelings don't change. I am glad that I graduated and I wanna cut all ties from most of these boot-licking, fake, disgusting people. Really cmi la! Haha.. Hearing experiences from my other friends, I am glad that my preceptor and other people at my branch are generally nice. Some people from hospital background do the mentoring ala hospital and that is something I hate! Phui! Gosh.. I guess they are not wrong though, it is just that I do not find that method of mentoring works for me. So although it gets tiring to wake up early everyday and to start re-reading my old notes and to do my assignments, I am still thankful for my placement ba. Though sometimes I feel jealous with a friend of mine who just works for 3.5days a week. That is just really nice :( 3 solid days to study is much better than a few hours everyday... Haiz.. No wonder she looks so happy and all smile-y. Was not really like that at school last time. Haha.. Sometimes when I am tired and emo, I feel regretful that I did not follow my heart while choosing which organisation :(

Oh ya, I did not get the award.. Should not have submitted my cca record sia.. Throw face -_-" And that makes me really don't wanna go commencement liao. So pointless to waste a day of my annual leave for this kind of useless/meaningless stuff leh. Gosh.. I am not interested to pay for stage photo as well. Haha.. I don't think I will wanna keep a photo with a stranger I don't even know or have any sense of attachment with. I know my parents will scold me about this but who cares :p I also look terrible with a mortarboard! Zz.. All the more I shouldn't go right? Sigh..

One interesting happened this week. I don't know what my agent is doing but it seems that my landlord is also getting irritated. She sent her mother to my workplace to look for me! Oh my god!! Haha.. That time I happened to go to the counter to call for a patient so she happened to see me. Haha.. I asked her what she was doing there and she said that she had been looking for me for 3 days o_0 Anyway it is already confirmed that I will stay there ba.. Just that officially not yet due to the contract etc haiz.. Now just stress over moving to a new place as I have not got any mover yet.. Aaaargh...

Haiz okay I will emo in my jealousy now :(

First week of work

It was finally over. Sigh.. Getting to wake up early everyday (including Saturday!) proves to be quite challenging. I am tired. And I feel that I have no life. I have to wake up early and by the time I am home, it is too tiring to do anything already. It is already difficult to focus on doing the assignments.. Don't even talk about having time to play games or watch dorama. Haiz..

Although it is tiring, I still can bear it. So far, I don't HATE my job. In fact, I think the environment is good. The PTs are nice when approached for help, especially with regards with the computer system which I am a total noob. My preceptor has also been very understanding. Perhaps it was only the orientation week so she can't expect too much also rite? Lol.. But I am glad that she does not expect me to be superhuman to lets say immediately master the computer system etc which will definitely take time.

However, she will test me on cold and flu medicine next week (or rather tomorrow!). Gosh!! It is a horror to find out that I almost completely forget everything which I learnt from Watsons 2 years ago. Haiz.. It is really from the scratch again. I will do my best and I hope when tested I won't get scolded for being so stupid or something.

My weekend is gone.. One cousin is in Singapore but I cannot afford the time to accompany her =x I have to do laundry and iron clothes for next week.. I have to study.. I have to finish the dermatology assignment which is due on Friday. And I still need to go to church.

Anyway, I gotta be glad that so far job satisfaction is still at an all-time-high. Haha.. Liking and hating my job makes a huge different. And I have not complained this week (as compared to complaining on the first few days because of the old locum guy in Watsons or on the first DAY in NUH because of that shit woman) so things are still pretty rosy now :) I hope it stays on that way.

 
    http://www.youmaker.com/

The song is about Tanabata, a Japanese festival. But the music is country! Interesting eh?

First Day at Work!

The first half of the day was just orientation at the HQ so I don't think there is anything special. Lol.. As expected, gotta report back to work afterwards. Anyway I am not trying to be positive, but I really think that this is not gonna be as bad as last year.

My preceptor seems nice and other people (based on the face alone) seems nice too. They definitely look friendlier/more helpful and approachable than the people from my previous 2 attachments. In addition, there are some people who also had their first day today, just like me. So overall, I think it will be a condusive learning environment for me.

The workload is crazy. And I feel damn stupid and inadequate. As the things being mentioned, I hardly can recall anything.. Not even the "basic" stuff like legal dispensing requirements etc.. Oh man! Gotta rough it up from the start again! I promise that I gonna give my best effort this time. And then IF I see that bitch again someday during one of my rotations, I am gonna show her that I can be trained. It's just her who sucks :p Although she can still shoot me down with her cancer speciality but who cares.. I am still hoping that that part of rotation is cancelled though. Hoho.. Just the thought of possibility of seeing her face alone alr makes me emo sia..

Anyway I am very tired.. Gotta spend at least 4 hours for transport alone sigh..  But today the agent called me to confirm that I can stay in the place which I want. So I guess that's another load off my shoulder. I just collected my K800i phone after replacing its back cover. Hehe.. With additional cost of $53.50, that makes it as the MOST EXPENSIVE alarm clock ever! Lol.. $350 for a phone which I mainly use as alarm only haha.. I love my K800i but I am really worried that the rubber will be sticky again leh :'(

Gotta sleep early today and may tomorrow be a better day, or at least as good as today then can liao. Haha...

Bye bye student's life.. Welcome to the working world :(

Deep inside my heart, I wish that I only start work on the 1st of July. But I don't have a choice, you see.. I am feeling a bit emo now.. A bit childish.. A bit unrealistic.. Hoping that I can slack and have holiday forever and ever.. Sigh..

Anyway this time it will be 9 months.. And there will be no more running away.. Just to put things in better perspective: I guess it's better to emo because of having to work than because of finding work!!

I just hope that I will get along well with my preceptor and the people at my workplace.. That's my current biggest worry. Tomorrow is orientation for half a day. After that I am still unsure whether I will be expected to go to work. I am hoping not :( But I guess I prepare my mind for a yes, so that I won't be disappointed if that is really the case :(

Oh well.. I gotta sleep now.. I hope I can wake up with a fresh mind and happy soul tomorrow..

And dear my property agent, PLS CONTACT ME T_T

Bye bye holidays :'(

Perhaps this will be my final post as a student as from Monday onwards, I am officially entering the working world. Sigh.. I am feeling very emo.. Perhaps because it is time for another change again. New people, new habits, new places, new environment. My greatest fear is that I am no longer a student now. I know how deficient I am as a pharmacist-to-be. I am worried that I will get another unreasonable and unloving preceptor which not only will dampen my mood to learn but my mood to even survive the 9 months.. Oh well.. positive thinking positive thinking but I am still feeling very emo :(

It has been almost 2 weeks and more or less I am pretty done with what I am supposed to do. I did my medical check up last week. I was lucky to be able to do it on the same day after I collected my letter. I was worried about my eyes to be honest, thus it was a pleasant surprise that my vision was still 6/6 (left) and 6/9 (right) although I am pretty sure my vision was much worse than the first time I had this spectacles. Oh well..

The doctor who did my examination has a cool name: Summer. Lol.. Then on the Sunday newspaper, she was in an article about some weight loss/health. Lol.. She had a Japanese name (perhaps her surname) too. Haha.. But she was quite cool la.. She was asking about any unexplained weight loss and I replied "Unexplained weight gain yes!". She laughed and said "Haha I wonder whether I should ask this question anymore. Almost everyone was complaining about weight gain instead".

I had a pleasant surprise to actually meet 2 friends who were doing preceptorship. Lol.. One saw me from and actually shouted my name across. Haha. The hospital was very not crowded that he could see me la. Lol.. Another one knew I was there because she heard the other friend shouted my name previously lol. Well without them I would have some problems finding the place.

I went for a blood donation on Saturday since perhaps I would not have any further chance to do it. I still had the trauma of fainting and feeling tired after donation. But I think it was just all in the mind. I felt okay after this donation. I also collected my 5th donation badge. It was quite nice but a bit disappointed because I thought my name would be engraved LOL.

Last Monday I finished the SPC stuff and then watched X-men: First Class. It was quite a nice show but I am very disappointed that Emma Frost did not get the chance to join the final battle. Sigh.. So lame to just have her sitting down acting sexy in the prison! As the previous X-men movies, it does not exactly follow the comic timeline. But it was worse that it was not even consistent with the previous X-men movies. Oh well.. After that I actually tried to find and rewatch the previous X-men movies. Haha.. I actually had never watch the first one leh.

After that, I was stressed over getting accomodation. Sigh.. House viewing was quite tiring. The first one I viewed made me emo. Sigh... It is not bad actually (3 bedrooms) and I can walk to workplace. However, the owner is an old lady and she hardly had any furniture. The kitchen looked so ancient. I did not feel any "homely" environment so I decided to give it a miss. That night I was damn emo actually. On the day before, I enquired for 4 places and 2 were taken, 1 gave no reply, and 1 said ok but no follow up.

The next day I had a follow up from the one I enquired 2 days ago. Fiuh.. This was actually my first priority. It is so near to church and Toa Payoh centre (with library, MRT, bus interchange there) and it is a 4A flat type. I was quite worried with the owner profile but after seeing, they are very nice people. They also can speak English! Haha.. 

I was cheated by an advertisement for a condo. I thought same price as HDB but this one was condo. Good bargain! Of course it was too good to be true. It was advertised as a common room but it was actually damn small utility room. I was damn disgusted by the owner seriously (although being fellow Indonesians I thought it would be okay). The room was even smaller than the toilet! Oh come on!! The living room, balcony, and kitchen are sooo huge but empty. Might as well I stay at the balcony. Oh well. So sad gotta say bye bye to the gym and swimming pool.

I settled for the one near the MRT. The agent said yes but until now no follow up. It gets me very worried since I have not signed anything which means there is no guarantee that the place will be mine :( Something interesting, the agent will actually be participating in some idol show. Omg.. Perhaps that's the reason for all the delays but haiz.. I don't know how leh :( If until the 20th I hear nothing, I think will try to find another place.Sigh.. I hate some agents for being too pushy.. Then the one I want is the opposite and making me worried whether the place would be mine or not. Sigh..

I went for PC show yesterday. I did not intend to go but when I see there is another small discount for internet broadband plan, I was tempted (since I will need one anyways). The moment I saw that registration fee is waived at the show, I straight away went lol. Cheapskate for ~$40 saving. Haha.. I find it weird that it is considered as signing up a new line. I must put deposit $200 again. And they need to proof my billing address again! Sigh.. Utterly stupid and ridiculous I tell you. I am having a mobile phone with them and why can't the 2 be tied together except for the payment! Lame shit! And guess what's worse: the deposit cannot be cashed back! Sigh.. Even after I get my Employment Pass (which only be next year), the deposit will be used to offset my bills. That is like forcing me to keep subscribing to them for at least 10 more months. Bleah.. I don't know whether my Training Employment Pass will be considered as EP proper or not but I foresee that it will not be and I need to wait until next year before I get my deposit back. And yeah I have $400 deposit for my phone and for my broadband. Grrah..

Got a plan to go Sentosa today but I felt lazy. Suddenly the meeting time was changed last night and I just lost my mood lah. Oh well.. I am very emo that I can no longer enjoy the good food in NUS (lol) and the students special. My olio chunks stall at Science is already closed. And I am glad that I went Spinelli today as it will open on weekdays only during holiday (gosh! I thought I could still enjoy it on Saturday!). I had McDonalds yesterday for the sake of getting the Coke can glass. Bleah.. Already full and felt sick halfway through the fries only nia... And as I thought I could relax today, I received an SMS that my bank card is replaced with a new one through mail. I was like "WTF!". It was not clear whether the card was just sent or I was expected to receive it already. I called and was told that it was already sent since 10 May. Holy crap! Thank goodness it was still safe in the mailbox. Perhaps it was not a wrong decision not to go Sentosa today eh..

Oh and at school I bumped into a grad student in my lab last time. She told me my work was going to be published. Lol I just pretend to smile and never said anything. Deep inside my heart I was like thinking "Is it really my work? That rubbish non-reproducible results?". Haha.. I doubt it is my work la.. Perhaps she just told me out of courtesy but actually it was my mentor's work. And honestly I see no big deal about publication whatsoever since the end I only got an A-.

Haiz ok back to emo now :( Tomorrow gotta wash laundry and prepare work clothes :( Not to mention that I will do ushering from 430-10pm. Aaaargh

Last Holiday

Too short :( How I wish it could be longer.. Sigh.. I did not blog much at home. Partly because I did nothing much.. Partly because I had too little time to do anything I planned to do. Exercise plan was completely shattered. After 1.5 years, I just lost all the muscle strength and flexibility to do anything much. The plan to fix the lightings of my toy cabinet was also not fulfilled. Car was completely untouched so my driving skills went from rusty to I-dunno-what.

Haha so what exactly did I do la? I managed to complete my 1.5 years worth of manga. Actually I almost did not complete. Was kinda chionging a bit in the end. Haha.. To make matters worse, I bought 4 new titles (Shanao Yoshitsune, Shanao Yoshitsune Genpei Wars, Black Butler, and Sanzoku-Ou King of Bandits) and 2 titles (Busou Renkin and Roullette Battler) of second hand manga. Lol.. Initially I wanted to buy those missing ones from the new titles which I did not manage to hunt even until Pontianak. I ended up getting hooked to 2 new titles lol. But overall I am glad because they are all GOOD!! Hoho..

And as expected, I needed to rearrange my storage cupboard because my manga collection finally exceeded the stipulated space. Sigh :( I promised myself not to exceed leh!! Gosh. But anyway I moved all my anime books to a plastic container for better storage. And I managed to list down all my manga and anime books. Yay.. At least I did something useful.

Cleaning my figurines cabinet was a chore. Lol after 1.5years, the amount of dust was just err... Anyway gotta clean it and I also took picture of those I never took before :) I upload some other days bah.. now the pictures are still in my phone.

I only managed to finish watching Gokusen Season 1. Sigh.. Last time I tested the DVD they were okay but now only 2 out of 12 worked fine. Had to download the whole series eventually. I initially was hoping to finish all 3 seasons.. Bleah.. And even though I still had my One Pound Gospel unwatched from 1.5 years ago, I downloaded 3 new series to watch lol: Zettai Kareshi, Tokyo DOGS, and Proposal Daisakusen. I actually still wanted to download Sunao ni Narenakute but I ran out of my harddisk memory! Sigh.. I did not bring my external HDD back because I thought I would not need. I also had Beck Live Action Movie. Yiipee...

Lastly, the most important thing which I would like to highlight from my 4 weeks holiday at home is WAGYU STEAK!! Mwahaha.. I finally got a taste of wagyu beef.. Not once but twice! Lol.. Got a new restaurant near my house and it is selling wagyu steak 200gr for Rp 90000 only! Damn cheap nia! Haha.. The first time I went only with my younger sister and mom. Then my mom recommended the place to my dad so that was the second time. Haha.. Without comparing with other things, it taste like any other beef lar. But my sister ordered normal New Zealand steak and after comparing, the wagyu is really softer/easier to cut/nicer to chew on and more importantly, less fatty!! Woohoo.. Well.. dreams come true hoho...

That summarises my holiday.. Sigh.. Emo now.. Welcome to reality (of the working world soon)