Kiasu

Ah... for countless times already that I am feeling down, low, and stupid again since the school began. It seems that there are some smart people. Actually it is okay that there are smart people. What I cannot tolerate is that the fact that they are showing off and arrogant (well, I perceive it that way). It is my nature that I don't want to lose but it is a different thing to admit defeat to people like I mention above. I mean it is okay if they are humble, then they worth the smartness bestowed upon them. But if they are arrogant.... I always want to beat them to show that you can actually be smart and humble at the same time. Haiz... I don't know but I have low confidence that I will be able to excel here. I believe that the sky is endless, thus I am sure that there are people more capable than me. Hmm... hopefully I can do something to soothe my self-pity mood and at least try my best. At least CAP 3.5 first to maintain the free allowance. Haha...

I just did DISC personality test today. Hmm... It is not surprising that my C is still the highest (erm... I am still kiasu) and my I is low (I don't want to be a salesman anyway). But I was surprised that my D is very low... Hix hix... That means I am not very well suited to be a manager/director/CEO.. Ah... my chance of earning big money and being rich is diminished... Well, I believe life is pre-destined so I leave my fate up to God. However, the biggest shock, was my S is only a point below my C. It means that I am very good in working in a group because I am tolerant and accomodative... I suppose being good to work in a group and liking it are two different things. Hahaha...

For the second time I made the same mistake of alighting at the wrong bus stop. And worse... I alighted at the SAME wrong bus stop. Haha... Actually today before the bus stopped, I knew it was the wrong stop. But I was too paiseh to say that I pressed wrongly to the bus stop. Luckily only 2 bus stops away. So I walked (instead of taking bus again like the other time). I consider that as an exercise. And talking about exercise, surprisingly my weight dropped 2 kg for no reason. Yay!!! I hope the reason is not stress. I can die young.. Haha...

Everything is going on full force next week... All lessons start and CCA starts too. I hope the CCA will be a fun experience, not a dreadful one.... I feel very tired of the past week. Especially after physio tutorial. Now I love anatomy more.... though I was saboed to say some things about lungs yesterday. Haha... Well, I suppose I cannot go any lower than this.

My body

Oh yes! I am being vain again and I will complain about my body. The sebum secretion level of my face is already beyond normal. 2 oil blotter papers are needed for one time of wiping. I feel very irritated with this. I just hope that all the discomfort I am feeling in my teenage years will be paid of later in older age when my face does not age. Grrr... Next is my hair. It is so naughty and I give up to try to style it. I tried 3 different kinds of wax (of course I applied them at different times, not all three for 1 application) but neither worked. My hair kept falling down and returned to its messy state. All these hair affair nearly caused me coming to school late on Thursday. And in the attempt to set my hair, I used more amount today. Still, it was futile. I end up plucking up my hair in desperation to style it. I used so much that after I washed my hair 3 times, I still feel waxy up there and I can still feel the locations where I plucked a few strands of hair in the attempt to get rid of the wax. Oh well, such is the disadvantage of the hair which looks like it is being waxed while it is not, it looks like it is not being waxed while it is. Darn...

Just had a reunion (or was it a farewell?) wih some of the ex-JC classmates at Fish & Co across Plaza Singapura. They all said I have changed and become so much happier. Haha... I think they have been mistaken if they think my real self is what they saw in my JC life. At school, I am always in a bad mood. So there's no way I can feel happy. But outside.... Woohoo... I can be quite a crazy guy. Hmmm nuff said. Some people are studying abroad. Good luck for them. Now I cannot imagine going to study to another foreign land. I can't even remember the feeling when I was about to be sent to study here anyway. But one thing for sure, I also want to go overseas (even though I am quite sick of moving from one place to another). I am sure that overseas will offer me an opportunity of a better-quality life as in less stress and more meaning in life other than money and achievements! I am sick of those!!!

^_^

Wow.... Today marked the first day that I ponned lecture since university began. Haha... I am turning to a bad boy. I think my first ponning in JC was like late in the first year (or was it even in the second year when I was called by the teacher during the lecture I skipped?). But never mind. I missed only a talk. Although the topic is interesting, I still prefer slacking. Haha...

My life lately has been eventless so there is nothing much to write. But I prefer it to be eventless than full of bad things. Haha... This morning I pulled the string of my window shades too 'hatefully' and thus it snapped. Bloody hell. The maintenance (hey... I finally learnt how to spell this from PPDA lecture yesterday) guy said that it would only be fixed on Monday. I hope it will. Darn... I will spend my weekend gloomily with no afternoon nap.

Finally I have felt the pressure of school. Lab is starting and tutorial already started. I mugged nervous this morning and thank goodness the mcq test was cancelled. It was more like a Q&A session and lucky me that I was not called to answer (better not to make myself too prominent... not prominent already got so many gossips around... haiz...). I hope that I will not fall into depression again and everything will be alright. Though 1 thing for sure, I have ditch my computer no matter what. Otherwise, I won't have enough time to study and do tutorials.

=(

Time flew so fast and soon my slack weeks are over (this week still has no practical but tutorial starts and next week practical starts) as well as exam weeks will come quite quickly. I need to focus and learn to keep my laptop so that it won't distract me from mugging. So far, only PPDA needs to be mugged (first 2 chapters) but I think I need to mug physio for the tests during the tutorials. Bheee...

I am lacking of sleep. After the talk on Monday, I spent time up to 130 (or was it 230) to reset my computer. Now I feel better about it but I think it's getting slower (I don't know what the freak the 2MB RAM is doing... nor do I know where does my 40 GB go missing). And the mega disaster is the only 90days antivirus. How to get another free antivirus? I don't mind buying but I don't want to pay for annual subscription! Very expensive. Ah...that reminds me that I wanted to buy a 2GB thumbdrive. On Monday there was no stock but I was quite shocked to see that it would cost me $50.

Yesterday Emma asked me to join her netball cca. Actually I was pretty tempted to join but I was too paiseh because 1)netball is a girls' game 2)we were late 3)very few guys and the very few guys are quite the sporty type. So I decided to go home. Haha...

Pendulum

Ah...my mood is swinging again. Thank goodness it is swinging to the better condition. After my deepest depression on Thursday, I started to feel better on Friday and today. Haiz... I can't believe myself that I already start mugging after first week of school. But how? No choice! I can't follow the lessons so far and there is so much to work on. I guess tomorrow and Monday I will feel blue again as I won't be able to memorise PPDA lecture 2 and will be lost in space for PPDA lecture 3. Huh...just the thought of it already makes my head heavy now. Plus, there is some talk on Monday. I don't mind about the talk but I mind A LOT about the attire: blue shirt plus tie! WTH! I have 8 hours of lecture on Monday. Sigh....

Just finished my RCIY outing. I had a good time. Hurray!!! Everything was free. Lol. The fish and chips was good. The batter was good that I did not taste any fishy taste (beats Long John's Silver) and the vinegar was very funny. It has the worst smell of any vinegar I ever encountered but it is the least sour. Weird huh?? Then come the salsa dance. I was kind of expecting either a karaoke or a dance as the surprise. Lucky that it was not the former. I am so bad in singing lah. Haha... And thanks to Ee Jin who drove me back to PGP. Lazy me...

Hmm... I must sleep now. Must go to church tomorrow. And I may have to dig my luggage to find my very dark blue shirt. Sigh...if I don't find it, tomorrow will be a horrendous day as I have to travel to the nearest carrefour to buy some cheapo blue shirt. I hope I still have my blue shirt.

And I must not forget checking my Gundam Wing CD. Dammit! The first episode is not working. How to watch loh!!!!

I'm DEAD

NOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!! Only (almost) a week of school passed but I am already feeling that I am in a deep trouble. I hate the subjects. I don't understand them!!! Physiology and Anatomy are quite okay. They are biology so basically just listen to the teachers and memorise the whole thing. No brain work. But Physical Pharmacy and Principle of Drug Action are HELL!!! I was so confused what the hell F was for. I don't mean the vulgar F-word, but it's the degree of freedom. Thanks to Wikipedia and some other websites now I know how to use the F thing la. But PPDA is the worst subject that I ever encountered in my whole life. It also shattered my love for chemistry.... Not only I can no longer recall the priority list for nomenclature which I mugged the whole day yesterday, I still have so many freaky words to remember. Must remember all the freaky structures also. Then I also don't know how to name things.... Darn it darn it darn it!!! And to make all things worse: lessons are not full yet this week. There were no lab sessions and there will be no tutorial tomorrow. If I am already so stressed now, I don't know what will happen to me on week 3 onwards. Maybe I will kill myself.

I have never been this down, pessimistic, and discouraged before. Haiz... Never mind.. I shall entertain myself by watching Prince of Tennis National Championship OVA again!!! At least there is a good thing I am looking forward to this Saturday: RCIY outing. I hope that can lift up my spirit.

Today sucks

BAD DAY BAD DAY BAD DAY.... I don't know why I am feeling very bad today... I don't know why bad things are happening to me today...

This morning I woke up pretty late and I was quite in rush to go to church. Fiuh... Although I was not late in the end, it was quite an irritating start of the day. Even my 'grand' plan to eat shumay for breakfast failed because the shumays looked black and disgusting. Yucks yucks yucks...

After church, I went to Central Library to print lecture slides. Bloody hell... I did not know how to print powerpoint slides and my first tried left me with 44pages. I immediately threw it away. There's no chance that I'm keeping a 44-page notes with me. Then I got smarter a bit and managed to squeeze in 6 slides, then 4 slides, a page. Unfortunately, the slides became so small that I could not read the prints in the diagrams. I settled with 2 slides per page. I think in the end, I threw nearly 80 pages (time that with 5 cents and it means I threw away $4). Well never mind...

Lunch was also a bad day because the stupid auntie kept yakking in chinese. She forgot my order and skipped me 2x. I waited for more than bloody 15 minutes and the noodle turned up to be sucky. Haiz... Even the beef was like left over parts of the cow... I WON'T BUY ANYTHING ELSE FROM THAT STALL!!!!

After my afternoon nap, I went to IKEA to buy ironing board. My bad luck still continued. I took the bus in the wrong direction. The bus did not exactly stop in front of IKEA so I had to walk quite a far distance (see the bright side: I was exercising to burn up my fats). I had a hard time finding the board and was fuming because of the long queue. It was starting to rain as I walked from the bus stop back to my place. I was half running and my whole body sweated. After I reached my room, the rain stopped. What the...

Okay, there are still good things happening to me today. Firstly, I met some people on the bus whom I expected to be going to the church. So I did not get lost to find my way to the church. Hmm...let me write more about the church. I went to the Holy Cross. I think it is still under renovation (or under construction... I have no idea). One funny thing is that I could not see any cross outside or inside the church, while the name is Holy Cross. I wonder. But the church has a very good priest. I enjoyed his homily very much (though he spoke a bit too fast).

Then there is a good hotdog at IKEA. Haha...

Tomorrow school starts again. And interestingly, this is the first time ever that I feel looking forward to school. I don't know why. Perhaps it's because 8 months of slacking has made my subconscious self to miss the mugging mode...

O-week

Woah.... Time flew so fast. 8 months had passed by and now school is going to start soon. It has been orientation for the past week and at the end of it, I am feeling very tired.... Haiz... One thing for sure, I want to thank God for posting me into pharmacy. I am very glad that it is a very fun place. I saw the people and although it is impossible to get a zero people I hate, I believe the majority would be okay. Unlike in my JC lah. I really hope so. One thing for sure, there is no JC-domination. It is quite mixed so I believe that there will be more fun, more friendship, and less rivalry and JEALOUSY and KIASUNESS. One interesting thing I found out: there are so many familiar faces in the sense that I had seen many of the faces somewhere else or at someone else. Weird huh?

I am also glad that the people in my OG are so nice. Haha... I feel comfortable with them. And we are a very relaxed group, always came late, seldom completed any station games, and lost the games most of the time. The name is quite cute: CAREBEARS and we did not really care about the stupid cheer we had (we only had one so no choice).

First day was normal ice breaking game and station games. The games were pretty standard like spider web, picking candies in the flour, and the passing disgusting stuff from cheek to cheek (this time around were coldgate, tomato , and camouflage cream). The new games were the games inspired by the Taiwanese TV shows (the group was divided to smaller groups and each small group had to perform different task in a given time... thank goodness I got the easiest: passing a hullahoop through 6 people whose hands are joined. The last station we played was pretty disgusting: passing through 5 cups of live worms and disgusting dirt from one sleeve to the other and to the other person down the chain. Yucks... fortunately the cups were only half-filled so there was no chance the content would drop/spill. Haha... The night walk was pretty lame and we were bored to death waiting for our turn. Nothing really memorable except the embarassing moment of dancing while blindfolded. Well...whatever.... I could not sleep that night because the aircon was dead. It was super hot. And it was super cold when the aircon was working at about 3 am. Actually the problem was not the aircon. I felt uncomfortable without sleeping bag because I could feel my tailbone touching the floor. Because of this that I decided not to stay on other nights...and the distance from LT 22 to SRC for bathe is also too far. End up sweating again after bathing when walking back to the LT.

Second day was Flag Day!!! Hurray!!! It was a very boring and dreadful day. I was the only guy in my group left because the rest were ragging/dancing. The morning session was awful. I stood at wrong spot and ended up wasting my energy and my voice asking for money but getting very little. I think the seniors thought that I was slacking lor... I moved to the spot where my friends got a lot and yeah.... the problem was in the place... not in me... Hahaha... I got a lot (the can was heavy) and I felt very thick faced that day. Woah... it was very intimidating for the bus passengers that the moment the bus doors opened and they alighted, they were attacked by so many flaggers. But don't care lah. Haha... The night game was the best thing during the whole camp: candlelight soccer. Although my group was saboed by the rest, we only broke one string. It was a good achievement!!! I was a very good fire extinguisher but I was running out saliva at the end of the game. Perhaps I was not blowing but spitting at other people's candles. Hohoho...

We ended early at 3pm on Wednesday and it was pretty a boring day. There was faculty department intro (wow... the lecturers are still young and hip... it will be a very interesting learning experience here) and ultimate frisbee which I expected to be fun but turned out to be boring. Ah ya... there was a bimbo talk... Haha.. I almost forgot about that. It was more for girls but it was quite enriching lah (unfortunately I could not remember what the content of the talk leh... but I remembered that because I was rushing to go home, I forgot to take the freebies).

Thursday was a National Day Holiday so there was no camp. I went for the performance session

of the Indon orientation. Woa... I was glad that I did not went for the games session in the morning. I guess I just could not mix with the non-ex-scholars. I don't know why... I was in a bad and confused mood over some bidding stuff lah. Haiz... Don't want to talk about the bidding lah...

I guess the camp was getting more and more boring. The interesting thing on Friday was FOOD HUNT. Firstly we went to the Roti Prata House at Upper Thomson (not my first time so I was not so excited). Secondly was a normal western food at S11 near AMK Hub. Then we went to some secluded place at Potong Pasir for a mere Ice Lemon Tea -_-. Lastly we went to Tiong Bahru for Ice Kachang and dinner. No time to went for the 5th one: Nasi Briyani at 6th Avenue. The night station games were quite exciting. Woohoo...we won 3 and lost 2. We won the Balloon Stepping (though I did not step any balloon at all), finding the shoes while blindfolded (though I only found 1 shoe), and the eating cracker with disgusting (mayo+mustard+chilli) sauce (though it was because I still got time to run back to take my chopstick with me whilst my opponent just happily ran away without the chopstick). We lost the lame games lah so I don't bother to mention, except the eating watermelon. Yucks yucks yucks...

Finally, Ta ra da da: today was RAG day!!! Charade and some lame kissing games in the morning and going to Padang at about 1245. Reached there at about 130 and still had to wait for bloody 1.5 hours for the RAG to start properly. It was worth going though. Some, in fact, MANY of the floats and dances were just AMAZING. I was IMPRESSED!!! Shame on my fac's loh... The dance saved our face but the float was terrible. After so much ra ra and hoo hah about ragging, the rag sucked and the dancers who shone. Ironically, the dancers were more low profile and the float builders were like the great ones... Crazy... I am still wondering who won in the end. Haha... I brought sunburns as my souvenir. And I am feeling very sad because I ate something wrongly. My body shows allergic reactions: red spots on my upper arms. I hope my body will detox tomorrow and the red spots are gone by tomorrow...

Okay... I gues that's all. I am tired liao.

New Life

It has been really a long time since the last time I blogged. Basically I had been very busy for the past week because of the moving to the new place, friends and relatives are coming, preparation for school stuff, and a lot more. Finally the week is over!!!!

The unpacking ended at 0130 am and there was this bloody kid who cried and screamed at 3 am. I woke up and the on the following morning, the same brat cried again at 7. Yah...so my sleep was extremely lacking for the past week.

I just bought a new laptop and I am still getting used to use it. I need to be able to do changes here and there because the computer was already pre-set. Sucks leh.... But it is a good comp. I like the smaller one (12 inches) and this one is quite high-tech. There is web cam which I don't really know how to use. And there is the security system using fingerprints. Quite cool huh? I am just scared if something funny happens to the fingerprint reader. Then I can't even log in to my account.

On Thursday, I went out with a friend whom I have not seen for more than 2 years. She is studying in Korea. Hahaha... It's good to see her and good to see that her personality is still the same. Had quite a hard time to decide what to have for dinner and we had a long time for taking some photo in the photobox machines. The first one was good but too bad the 2 pictures which I want (which I look good inside) was at 2 different slides. So I could not get both. Sigh.... I just realised that my artistic skill sucks. My decoration for the photos was terribly plain and ugly. Lol. And I realised that I am quite photogenic because I looked good in the photos. Mwahahaha...

Then on Saturday, I had a buffet lunch at Marina Mandarin with Kuma. Wow... I can no longer eat buffet. I only took one serving each of every food available but my stomach was so full and I could vomit anytime. Sigh... I was still thinking about the very good pork ham (wished that I took more than 1 slice) and the good dessert. 2 thumbs up for the desserts. They looked great and they tasted great though I ate it with a very full stomach.