Thursday, October 6, 2016

Plan B... start!

The rejection email finally came :( Sigh.. as nice as it is being worded, rejection still hurts. I wish they could have been more honest to just state whether I am rejected because my expected pay is indeed to high, or simply because I suck for the job. Gotta admit that I got my ego bruised and pretty upset about it. Haiz.. But after a good nap, I woke up feeling better.

Lucky I trust my gut feel and I already started my plan B this morning. I thought I could get more information about this first before updating my CV but the person asked for my CV as well. I did it last night and today I finally asked him. I am glad that I got a response for further discussion for me to find out more about the job.

It is pretty obvious that I have lowered my expectations from 'I want to change a job with an increased pay' to 'Never mind to change to something with the same pay'. If I fail again, I think I don't mind finding something else even with a pay cut. I am at my breaking point with my colleagues. Sigh.. Every morning I pray for humility and patience but every day I go home feeling upset and angry. I can't simply continue this any longer. I just want to do something for myself. There is no point working hard for everyone's goal when everyone else is slacking. I am tired being the 20% that contributes to the 80%. I want to be part of the 80% who only does 20% of the work.

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