Saturday, June 29, 2013

Tick tock tick tock..

My biological clock is ticking and I feel that I am becoming old really fast. Today I went to the newly opened JEM. I felt uncomfortable after alighting the MRT as I had no idea where to walk. I actually had no idea where the shopping mall is located or how near. Haha.. This was a contrast with my younger self. The first time I come to Singapore, I was adventurous. I loved going to places I did not know or I had not visited before. My younger self felt excited with the possibilities of losing ways and travelling to roads unknown. I wonder if I would enjoy my coming trip to Europe if I feel uncomfortable, rather than excited, to see new places and experience new things.

My friend was 30 minutes late so I had the chance to loiter around. There is still no sale for chino pants and jacket which I have been aiming at from Uniqlo. I went to H&M and I thought their jackets were of comparable price with Uniqlo's. In fact, H&M's feel more "atas". However, it does not really suit my purpose. With a relatively thick and heavy material, I think I will sweat and feel uncomfortable when I am wearing it to go outside on this sunny island.

My reason for going all the way to JEM is to get Samsung Galaxy Note 8. Challenger is having store opening promotion and is giving away free battery, free memory card, pouch etc, while stocks last. The promotion began 2 weeks ago and I came on the 2nd last day. Lol. The staff told me that they only had 10 sets for promotion and they were wiped out on the first day. They brought in another 15 which were gone by now. Oh well, promote until so big big but only 25 sets?? Tsk tsk tsk.. I am actually still undecided whether to buy a tablet or not. Sigh.. That's me.. Always think so hard for gadgets while I spend money like water when it comes to toys. Ironic indeed.

I had a meet-up with 2 friends on Friday. As age is slowly creeping, we grow more and more desperate to look for our partners in life. Haha.. I am feeling rather heartbroken lately. I mean I know that the girl I like since like 6 years ago is already attached. After seeing her picture with her boyfriend on facebook, I feel a bit jealous :( Anyway, a part of me feels happy that they look happy together.

When I see my secondary school friends who are married now, I always wonder why their husbands are not the super duper handsome type and rather plump too. And these girls are the quite pretty types in my opinion. Haha.. Seems like girls don't always look for the looks and body. Not saying that I am good looking or what la but I think I am better looking than some of these guys.. And yet I am still single.. No wonder people always suspect single good looking males are gays -__-" 

I admit I am still very self-centered and I am very choosy. I want a good girl, with good family, comparable social status, comparable brain power, Catholic, and the list goes on and on. Not to mention that I am very conservative too: I hope find the right one, date her, marry her, and have 4 kids (2 sons and 2 daughters). Haha.. I don't want to play around as I do not want to waste money and time for failed relationship. Sigh.. But perhaps the biggest hurdle for me to find the correct one is my limited social circle. I hardly have friends so how am I going to find a girlfriend in the first place? Haiz..

Despite how thick my skin is, I have a rather low-self esteem when it comes to having a girlfriend. I am not the romantic type and I don't think I am comfortable with public display of affection. Every time my clique friends are "playing" by holding my arm when we walk, I feel a bit uncomfortable. Perhaps I am uncomfortable because we are just friends la, I don't know. Haha.. But when I have one girl on one arm and another on the other arm, it felt embarassing too. Maybe people would think I am gay or what. Lol.. Perhaps it is another sign of aging: to get bothered about how others view me. In the past, I just can't be bothered as I am comfortable in my own skin and I know we are just holding arms for fun. Lol..

But honestly deep down in my heart, I am praying hard that God will send me a soulmate quickly. I don't mind getting married young actually. Haha.. And I do hope I can have first son, second daughter, third daughter, and fourth son. Although my "ideal" family is 2 sons and 2 daughters, I will stop if my first 3 are sons... But if my first 3 are daughters, God save me!!

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