Saturday, January 26, 2013

Hansel and Gretel Witch Hunters

This is another classic fairy tale turned into a Hollywood blood-fest action movie. I am interested in this right from the very first time I saw the trailer. Well, looking at ladies going badass (headbutts, fist fights, crossbow, and guns) always excites me! Haha..

The story is quite simply an "extension" the fairy tale. Hansel and Gretel, as children, found the witch's candy mansion, got trapped, before finally outwitting and roasted the witch. They were unable to find their parents and from they onwards, they live as witch hunters. Many years after the event, they unknowingly returned to their town of origin upon the mayor's request. Children have been abducted by witch(es) and our witch hunters are tasked to retrieve the kids alive. From here, we come across various witches, an aspiring witch hunter, and a bigger witches plot which also revealed "missing" past of our heroes.

Honestly, the movie kinda sucks. The story telling is pretty atrocious. How did Hansel and Gretel find out their past? The evil grand witch, Muriel, TOLD them -__-" The antagonist actually also revealed her evil plan. Isn't that pretty dumb? The only investigation that Hansel and Gretel ever do is to find the witches' last target.Okay, perhaps that is forgivable. After all, I know this would be bad right from the start and the main pull was actually the action. Unfortunately, even the action scenes left me unsatisfied. Phew..

I expected Ben to be Gretel's boyfriend and Mina to be Hansel's girlfried. I was wrong. I have no idea why they are in the movie in the first place since they serve no purpose. Bah.. Okay perhaps Ben is there only to wipe Gretel's boobs and Mina is to show off her naked butt. The only good acting here belongs to Gretel who showed a wide range of emotions such as being badass, being trashed by the evil people, being vulnerable, being worried in search of his brother, being curious to know her past, etc.

So yup, this is nowhere near "Hawkeye vs Jean Grey" that Marvel fans imagine. Haha.. For your info, Hansel is played by the same guy as Hawkeye in Marvel: The Avengers and Muriel is played by Jean Grey in X-men movie trilogy.


Shireen L. Platt said...

I enjoyed this movie, pure mindless entertainment! :-)

darkrose said...

Haha.. At least the ending did not leave me with WTH-did-I-just-watch kind of feeling :p