Things will get better

Looking back at this post from last year, the pattern is clearer now. Storm will always come during the period when I have to prepare my faith story. In the past two weeks, I felt that all the low points in my life which made me upset at God in the past resurfaced again. I am fed up with my family quarreling over household things like food and cleaning house while I am homeless here. I am also sick with helping my landlady every time she falls down. For goodness sake, I am not her personal caregiver. She falls down more frequently and yet does not do anything differently to avoid falling. Some colleagues were irritating last week and I had to keep telling myself not to get too emotional as it was just a heat of the moment. I stopped my regular bottled coffee/tea/mocha for a few months and it makes my body very sensitive to caffeine. Last week I bought 2 bottles for fun and on the two different days when I drank them, I had difficulty sleeping. The improper sleep contributed to my constantly irritated self as well.

The peak was yesterday. I deliberately logged in earlier just in case my office laptop would update something and lag. Everything was fine until when praise and worship began and the laptop decided to update. I had to install and use Zoom using my phone again like last year. Luckily the laptop managed to settle down and I did the faith story using the laptop. Fiuh.. with this over now, these disruptions should stop. That is why only today that I feel calmer and more willing to blog something. I also just completed praying the Rosary and the Chaplet of Saint Michael. Today is the feast day of Sts Michael, Gabriel and Raphael the Archangels which is the reason for me to pray the Chaplet on top of the Rosary today. When I just bought the chaplet last year, I intended on praying both daily but obviously I am not driven enough to do that. So thank God for allowing me to have a good state of mind to pray both prayers tonight.

With the month coming to an end, my money woes ends too. I am unnecessarily stressed trying to hit $500 spending without going 'overbudget' for my meals as I am worried about my weight and without spending on unnecessary things too. I am glad for September, I am comfortably under $200 for meals. Sadly, it is difficult to go under 60kg. I was so happy last week to hit 60kg again but I am at 61kg again today. Bleah... I guess that is a motivation for me to decide on extending my gym membership so that is $3060 down the drain. No thanks to all this vaccination discrimination, it stops me from going to gym and makes me lazy to do home exercises to.

Genshin Impact celebrates its 1 year anniversary yesterday. I do not really care about all the hoohah about the non-existent anniversary reward or atmosphere in the game as I still enjoy playing. Yes I spend money for the game but it motivates me to cut my spending on food. So far this strategy works well since I save more from the food as compared to the actual amount I spend for the game. If only it is effective for my weight loss too hehe..

The game keeps some data and share some of these milestones to celebrate our journey with the game so far. Too bad they do not put how much money I have spent to be part of this. Haha... Anyway, my highlight is Zhongli. I started spending in the game in order to get him last year. I suppose it is not a wrong investment since indeed I play with him the most, even up to today.

I just realised that I never post any picture of him so here is the cool guy who has been carrying me in game and makes me enjoy the game so far. I hope you don't get powercrept or become obsolete anytime soon.

Emotional

I usually blog after donating blood as reminder in case I forget when I am due for the next donation. That means I was supposed to write on last Saturday but I have been lazy and spending too much time with Genshin Impact. I arrived slightly before 10am and I was already the 8th person in the queue. Wew... Lucky for me that there were some first timers among those who arrived before me so they took more time with their forms and I managed to 'cut' queue. I went to Donki to get lunch and decided to skip the usual sushi to try their chashu don. I would say it is cheaper and more worth than the usual tray of salmon sushi. Hehe..

Miraculously I managed to hit 60kg for the first time this week. Ironically, this week happened to be my junkiest week. I finished 6 bags of Kettle potato chips this week. Last week I saw ongoing buy 2 get 1 free promotion (i.e. $9.90 for 3 bags) and I bought one on both Saturday and Sunday. I promise that I will no longer buy potato chips for the rest of the month and I am able to keep up with my promise so far. At least today I was not tempted to buy despite seeing the promotion is still ongoing.

I also lost my cool with work today. When shit happens, my boss will often ask me to settle the shit as I try to be helpful. I know usually others will lose cool and complain to my boss and although sometimes the reason is unreasonable, my boss just wants to help the complainer and asks me to look into the stuff. Hence I come the rubbish bin. I am tired and sick of it and I am not going to be a good guy like last year to just settle all the shit.

Today I snapped because someone who is resigning also mentions that she is overworking herself. The main reason for her to leave is basically the pay and this 'overworking' is not really the matter. The worst part is that she is overworking herself and it is not a problem with the workload to begin with. That's why I refused when being asked about the task distribution. I am already very lenient with my deadlines to the point that I have to adjust my own work to accommodate others and I know that we are not overworking the team. That is why I refuse to even look at the weekly task distribution because the issue is not with the task but with the person. She is not asked to overwork and the deadline of the tasks is not urgent or demanding so it is her own decision and problem that she overworks. Do not make that into my problem!

Anyway this matter was already discussed since last week so I am already really pissed over it over the week. But it was going to pile on me if I did not defend myself today and that was why I lost my cool. Anyway I was not only defending myself but indirectly also my boss and the team lead. I want them to realise that this is not a problem caused by us/management. Our expectations are reasonable and does not require overtime or what. We also do not expect people to overwork. The problem is the person so we should address the person. Do not try to tweak the work as if the problem is with the work/management.

Perhaps the blessing in disguise from this is that I decided not to be a facilitator for the upcoming Landings run. I was asked last week and I had a hard time thinking about it. On one side, I felt that this was one way that God called me to contribute: there are few returnees in the younger age and I am one of the youngest so perhaps I can connect better if I am the facilitator. On the other side, I felt that I did not have anymore mental and emotional capacity to 'take care' of others anymore. I am already tired taking care of others at work. Thus as much as I wanted to help facilitating, I might end up doing disservice if I lose my cool subsequently. In the end, I decided to say no since I know my short-fused self very well. 

My vaccine woe is finally ending and I just had my first Sinopharm dose this afternoon. I think my left will be sore tomorrow but at least I am 50% immune from discrimination now hehe.. The clinic I went to is located at Tanjong Pagar Plaza. Despite the name, I was surprised that this is actually an old shopping centre like in the 90s. I was expecting it to be some atas shopping mall since it is located in quite atas area.

The main drive for me to write this tonight is the overwhelming emotion from losing an aunt who is staying in New Zealand. I was still whatsapp-ing with her until last Thursday. I stopped because I ran out of topic. She was diagnosed with stage 4 colon cancer few months ago and recently she had been in hospital due to side effects from her first cycle of chemotherapy. Through my communication with her, I thought it was just normal GI side effects from the chemo and it would get better in time. It was really a shock when this Tuesday she was already transferred to a hospice. She just passed away a few hours ago.

I cried quite badly on Tuesday when I received the news as when I saw the photo, I knew it was just a matter of time. She is technically an outside relative as she is married to my uncle who is my mum's brother. Yet she is the most caring aunt because she notes down everyone's birthday: all my uncles and aunts and their spouses, my cousins and even their kids. When she came to Jakarta, she always brought everyone an individual gift. That really shows her love and care for all of us. Before the era of whatsapp, she wished me birthday through email and I still have those emails. She would even be asking about my sister who was not really using email then. Last year during my dad's passing, she was always eager to ask me for the livestream link of the all the masses.

As always, there is nothing I can do except to pray. I hope she is no longer in pain and is now in a better place with God in Heaven. If my dad can hear me, I hope he will also pray for her now to return the favour of her praying for him last year. I am also thankful to God that I still managed to message her last week and the week before that. Earlier this year, I decided to cut off all contacts and I did not even reply her birthday wish. Out of the blue my uncle messaged me two weeks ago. I was initially tempted to ignore since I did not know if my mum asked me to check on me. However, I heard about my aunt's cancer previously and hence I decided to reply my uncle. Surprisingly, my aunt messaged me the following day after hearing about me from my uncle. Today I just heard from my aunt who lives in the Netherlands that few weeks ago she was asked my aunt who passed away if she was able to contact me. T_T

Sigh.. it has been really tough these past 2 years after losing my dad, an uncle just barely 2 months ago and now an aunt. God when is my turn? It is easier for me to go than to see others go before me.

Gundam (Wing) fever

Two weeks ago I missed the preorder for limited edition 1/144 RX-78-2 Gundam Japan Pavilion Expo 2020 Dubai. I checked 2 hours after the email came in and the item was already sold out. I checked Premium Bandai facebook page and missed another batch of preorder few days later. Thank goodness they opened another batch which is still available until today so I bought two sets.

In another email today, there are new batch of Gundam Wing goods. Previously I bought the Tricolor set. Unlike previously when I was so eager to buy the moment I saw the merchandises, this time I was hesitant because of the monochrome white theme which I find boring.

Honestly I am rather tempted with the towel but it is not really worth buying just one item because of Premium Bandai's shipping. Sadly the shipping for these items is in November. If only they are also in  January 2022,  I will definitely get the towel since I can combine the flat shipping fee with the Gundam Japan Pavilion Expo.

Because of searching more information about this set, I discovered that I missed out so many Gundam Wing stuff from Gundam Cafe. When I could travel frequently to Japan in the past, there was never Gundam Wing collaboration. In the midst of COVID-19, suddenly Gundam Wing collaboration keeps appearing. Huhuhu...

Gundam Wing Night Oct 2019

I was not aware of this when I went to Japan in December 2019. However, I managed to get the acrylic sets when my friend went for honeymoon in Japan in February 2020. I am not usually into acrylic stands but I am such a sucker for Gundam Wing. Out of all the merchandises, acrylic stands are the only ones most worth keeping as collectibles. Lol.

Gundam Wing Gundam Cafe Tokyo Dinner Show Jan 2020

Gundam Wing Christmas 2020

Heero and Relena for New Year 2021

I tried to search for the merchandises from these 3 events in Yahoo! Auction Japan and Mandarake. The Christmas 2020 merchandises are the only ones available. Sadly the prices were crazy. Somehow I ended up in Mercari which had one reasonably priced. I have never used Mercari before and decided to use Buyee as the forwarder. There is another item from a different seller which I decided to skip since the consolidation and service fee would make that item too pricey.

Sadly my happiness was short lived. After receiving the confirmation order email, I somehow checked the facebook link in the email. Just half an hour before I registered for Buyee, they posted a link on facebook for 2000 JPY coupon for new registration. Darn!! I am upset that I just lost 2000 JPY although prior to this it would never cross my mind to check facebook for coupon code. Sigh.. I registered with another email to get the other item that I skipped earlier since I can use the coupon. Still, it would be awesome if I could save another 2000 JPY for the earlier order.

I will still be waiting for confirmation if the purchases for these two items would go through. Meanwhile I have to get ready to hunt for the next set. Yes.. this is still hot from the oven for Halloween 2021. The pre-order in Premium Bandai Japan is still open but all except Wufei standee is already not available. Haiz.. even when I am not late and theoretically can still pre-order this through proxy, the items are already sold out.

Gundam Wing Halloween 2021

While browsing further, I saw this watercolor set. This was already released before the monochrome set but sadly Premium Bandai Singapore never brought this in. If they bring in this, I will definitely buy everything except the T-shirt. This set is even better than the Tricolour set. I really like the colors and the illustration style for this set. The style of the acrylic sets is also very unique.

Miser

I am getting lazy to blog anything recently as I realise my life is getting monotonous and I will just end up rambling about the same things all over again. My mind is all about money, food, and not losing weight. All are inter-related and each takes turn to drive me crazy in varying degrees.

It looks very possible to keep my total spending for meals to below $200 this month. I do not have specific purpose for achieving this goal but this drives me to be a miserable miser this week. After every meals, I would calculate whether I would exceed and how much I could save for the weekends when usually I spend a bit more because the hawker center is not open. I was even upset with Grab hiding their 25% off for self pick-up promo today. There are ongoing 15% and 25% but somehow the 25% is not appearing unless I manually key in. The code is supposed to be active since last Saturday. The ridiculous thing is that the 10% difference is only equal to less than $1.50 of what I could have saved. Why am I so upset just over $1.50.

I failed to abstain from potato chips for the rest of this month with 2 packs of Doritos over the weekend. As usual, I regretted buying although that means I would not be tempted for Doritos anymore. At this point, I know only Kettles and Ruffles are worth buying for me but I will only buy when they are below $4 per bag. Even with this realisation, I am always tempted to get miscellaneous brands even though I know I would regret later on. Really addiction problem.

I do not know when I have the willpower to start my home exercises again. Haiz.. Despite the relatively strict diet control, I cannot lose further weight. I cannot cut my food even further as now I am only eating 1 meal for lunch and 2 bananas for dinner. I need to supplement it with physical activity already.

Haiz... see... I am just repeating all these things all over again. Perhaps to encourage myself, I should be proud that I was able to avoid 1-for-1 offer for Popeye's and Xing Fu Tang last week. Honestly in the past week, almost everyday I already put something in the Grab or Deliveroo cart but in the end I managed to restrain myself and just closed the app.

Wiped out

I am tired of trying to find a clinic where I still can register and get Sinovac. Out of the few I contacted last week, only one replied with no stock and currently not opening any more registration. I registered with another two clinic this week and both said officially no more Sinovac registration is accepted for first dose people due to stock. I am being redirected to Sinopharm registration which may be available in September. My stress evaporated since due to stock issues, it is no longer my fault for not getting vaccinated. Furthermore, I already told my boss about this so anytime my office allows people to return, I will just have to excuse myself. Thank goodness my gym allows me to wait until I settle my vaccination and give me the remaining 1.5 months membership that I still have.

One thing went down but another surfaced. I rarely removed my phone from the protective holder but somehow I did that on Wednesday to clean the dust. The back cover was coming off which was due to the battery being bloated. Thank goodness I was able to secure a slot at Huawei repair centre for the following day and I was able to settle my photos. Here comes the ridiculous part. Just because nowadays we cannot remove phone back cover to change battery ourselves, this has to be done at  the service centre. Changing battery should be something simple but I was told that it would take around two hours. The worst part was that the whole phone had to be wiped out. Seriously what the fuck. I just need the battery to be replaced and I do not need the operating system to be touched but they said it is the law bla bla bla.

I had to waste time walking around for those two hours. I could not even eat dinner thanks to the vaccination discrimination. The best place to spend time was at Kinokuniya but my attention span is greatly shortened now that I could not stay still just to read a book. I tried to browse some Japanese learning text book and I got dizzy after reading the introduction in a Kanji learning book. about onyomi (Chinese pronounciation) and kunyomi (Japanese pronounciation). I realised that I have forgotten much of what I learnt from my Nihongo classes few years back. Bleah... At least my friend recommended me Duolingo app so that I still can brush up.

The blessing in disguise from the two hours of standing around and walking aimlessly while waiting for my phone is that when COVID is over, I better practice shopping around before I travel overseas again. My legs are so painful and I cannot imagine how I can survive a day at Disneyland from opening to closing time. And I know just doing that for a day is not enough as usually I spend a minimum of two days. Haha.. In short, after 1.5 years of just rotting at home, my body will not be ready for overseas trip anymore. That also reminds me that I already stopped even exercising at home since the last round of gym closure. Haiz.. that means all my physical fitness is also gone.

I felt like an idiot after I realised that there is a back up option in the phone. I should have done that instead of just transferring the photos. So all the newly saved numbers since I changed to this new phone are all gone now. Haha... I am getting lazy to save numbers since it is easy to see who the numbers belong to in Whatsapp. I guess I can enjoy my peaceful and antisocial life even more now. Hehe... If someone needs me for something then I will eventually get the number again.

Sayonara Olympics 2020

2021 is like a year that does not exist. It was Euro 2020 earlier this year followed with the Olympics 2020. Despite being held this year, both events retain the 2020 as they were slated for last year and were delayed because of the pandemic. With the Olympics coming to a close tonight, the news will all be about COVID and vaccination again. And yep, the COVID is still 2019. Poor 2021.

In my previous post last week, I doubted if Indonesia could win any badminton gold so I was very happy to hear that the Women's Doubles won gold on the following day. Unfortunately I did not get to watch and join in the excitement as the match was in the afternoon and I was still working. Other than the badminton matches I caught two weeks ago, I only watched the final for Men 10m diving yesterday. Only after that I realised that I can actually stream meWATCH via laptop. That is goodbye to the app in the iPad. Haha...

As I am watching the closing ceremony right now, I cannot feeling sad about how cruel this pandemic has been. It reminds me of attending the closing ceremony of SEA Games 2015 and I imagined how more amazing this Olympics could have been if not because of COVID. To see the empty stadium and the quiet around the stadium is really heart-breaking. It must be quite sad for the athletes too as not everyone can attend the closing ceremony due to COVID precautions and they have to fly back few days after their last participating event. I also feel nostalgic when I see their landyards. I saw the landyards in Asian Games 2018 in Jakarta and it seems that despite they are all different Games, the design of the landyards is similar. Aaah.. I wonder if I am ever be able to experience this kind of involvement again. Nevertheless, I can only treasure the memories of SEA Games and Paragames 2015.

I am feeling miserable this weekend because of all the upcoming vaccination discrimination measures. Thank goodness at least Sinovac would be recognised now so I have pre-registered with a few clinics and now it is just waiting on when I can get a slot. I am not an anti-vaxxer but I am really skeptical about COVID vaccines which I think is just as useless as the annual flu vaccines. To me, what is the point of vaccination which cannot prevent disease. All the compulsory childhood vaccinations are effective to prevent those infections (e.g. TB, polio, DPT, hepatitis) and they are not just to reduce the risks bla bla bla. I know it is not compulsory for COVID but all the measures are as good as forcing everyone. Anyway since I have to do it to get the vaccinated status and all are quite shitty in terms of the efficacy, I choose the more traditional vaccine to minimise unknown risk with the newer mRNA technology and so far only Sinovac is available here.

On the bright side, it makes me hopeful of the possibility of travelling again. It is quite pathetic but I felt somewhat happy just simply of checking on how to renew my passport and about application for multiple entry to Japan. Haiz.. I wonder when life will be back to normal.

Too much screen

Olympics have begun but there seems to be no free screening that I can find in Youtube. I read that the opening ceremony included theme songs from games during the athletes' parade. I was curious but only managed to find snippets of certain countries from some random channels.

While waiting at my aunt's house on Monday, I was watching a badminton match of Loh Kean Yew. I learnt from my cousin that I could download meWATCH to catch Mediacorp screening since I do not have TV. Of course this means watching only whatever Mediacorp is showing instead of able to choose what sports I am interested in. Oh well, I managed to catch Jonatan Christie vs Loh Kean Yew match on Wednesday. It was a thrilling match but unfortunately it was because a close match, rather than an exciting match. There was too much of net play instead of cool rallies and smashes. It has been a very long time since I watched a live badminton match and in which I am rooting for someone to win. While Jonatan won this match, sadly he lost the next match in the round of 16. Looks like Indonesia is not able to win any badminton gold medals in this Olympics. Anyway I think this Olympics is quite a sad affair with empty audience stands. Without the shouts and screams from the supporters, it does not feel like a grand sporting events.

Earlier this week, the Thai TV channel where I usually follow the dramas was hacked. Because of that, all their recommended videos were changed to an anime channel Ani-One Asia. They recommend me Backflip!! and RE-MAIN which are animes about rhythmic gymnastics and water polo, respectively. I am sure Youtube algorithm is able to detect my interest in anime (for the Prince of Tennis songs I listen) and my recent searches for Olympics stuff to come up with that recommendations. I finished watching Backflip!! (yes there are 2 !!) which already completed airing but I am yet to start RE-MAIN (yes it is stylised with all capital letters) which is still airing and only at episode 4.

Genshin Impact just released the latest update with new region (Inazuma). I am not speed running but I have been spending more time playing this week as it is exciting again to explore new places and new story. At the same time, Mihoyo also released a new game called Tears of Themis this week. It is an otome card game so I am sure I will run out of interest soon. However for now, I still find it fresh and somehow the gacha seems much more generous than Genshin. It says a guaranteed SSR card every 100 pulls but I have been getting one for every 10-20 pulls. Usually a new game tends to be more generous. Anyway the main pull factor for me to try this game is the settings about law and crime investigations. The otome and the card game part are just like any other such games.

Haiz... this is why I am still feeling very tired despite having enough sleep this week. Too much screen time and not enough rest for the eyes. One huge thing that I am thankful of today is that I was able to attend mass. The rain was super heavy and windy this morning. Even if I took a bus, I would still be drenched under the umbrella while walking from the bus stop. Since I was already outside the house before it started raining, I decided to take 410W and if the rain did not stop, I would just go to Junction 8 to do my grocery shopping. God heard my prayer and the rain became light for a while when the bus was near the church. Thus I was able to walk from the bus stop to the church without getting drenched. Yay! 

Farewell, Godpa

My father passed away last year and this year I lost an uncle who has been a father figure for me while I am in Singapore. I am alone here and the only person with familial tie is my aunt who is now my godmother. I have been calling him as uncle and only when I visited him earlier this year during his hospitalisation, my godma told me that I should tell people that he is my godfather instead of my uncle. I am glad that I was able to visit him twice this year at the hospital. I visited him at home once after he was discharged but I did not manage to see him as he was napping then. Unfortunately, I was not able to visit in his last hospitalisation due to COVID restrictions.

I went to the wake on Friday and stayed for the whole day. I initially wanted to leave around dinner time but my godma asked me to stay. My godma only has 2 nieces and me as relatives here as the rest of our family in Indonesia could not come. My 2 cousins are already mothers so I am the only one without commitment and stayed on to accompany her. Her daughter is stuck in Australia and could not fly back. I know how it felt not able to fly back for father's funeral as it happened to me last year. I looked at this as perhaps God's way to allow me to experience something which I could not do to my own father and family last year.

Due to COVID restrictions, only 20 people were allowed at any time at the wake. That was the reason for me to choose Friday. Anyway I still have plenty of annual leave to clear so I might as well take leave to attend on Friday and leave the weekends for others to attend. I took leave again yesterday for the funeral mass followed with the cremation. It was my first time going to Mandai and I am impressed. It looks even more amazing than the crematorium in Jakarta which I thought was already very atas. I also learn that here we collect the ashes on the following day. From my previous experience in Jakarta, we usually wait for ~2 hours and then we will collect the bones which will then be ground to the ashes.

I helped with some readings during the Mass. Thanks to COVID, mic sharing was not allowed so I ended up having to read the first reading, psalm, second reading and general intercessions. With only 20 attendants, everyone was helping in one way or another. Honestly I was very self-conscious with my readings and my accent. I was so useless with other things so helping to read was the only thing that I could do. I am happy that they said my reading was alright and my accent was not too bad. At the same time, I cannot help to think perhaps it was just a pleasantry. Anyway whatever it is, I know it is wrong to be self-centered and thinking about myself. I should actually feel honoured and privileged to read in a Mass considering how sinful and unworthy I am.

Farewell, Godpa/Uncle. I will always remember and treasure my first encounter with you in 2003. Although we had not met before and you would not know how I looked like, you waited for me at the carpark when I went to your house for the very first time to store my barang-barang as I had to move hostel from secondary school to JC. I worried about how I would be able to identify you or your block since it was my first time visiting. It turned out that I had nothing to worry about as you approached me first when you saw me unloading my boxes from the taxi. I also remember how you carried my heaviest box which contained my textbooks and files while I was pushing the rest on a trolley. Back then, there was no lift directly to your floor so we still had to carry the things manually for one floor. You also helped me similarly when subsequently I had to move to my new hostel.

At times when I visited and my aunt was not home yet, it was never awkward to talk to you although technically we are not related by blood. Thank you for allowing me to have a home-like and family-like experience every time I visit. That really means a lot to me considering my actual state of homelessness and being all by myself here. I pray that you are no longer in pain and are happy in Heaven now. I even visualise that my dad would also welcome you and thank you for everything you did for me.

Cranky

The exchange of stopping junk food for Genshin Impact BP is working very well. After I bought BP, I became cranky and of course succumbed to getting potato chips again not to 1 but to 3 bags. Sigh.. I am upset because my weight does not seem to be dropping despite only eating one proper meal daily, cutting of all the junk food as well as sweet drinks at lunch. I do not mind the 'suffering' if I can see any benefits. I know maybe I am too impatient since it is just barely 2 weeks.

Addiction is scary. When I deprive myself, I get cranky and crave for my potato chips. Yet after fulfilling my cravings, I always end up feeling sad and regret which is not worth the 10-15 minutes of the joyful eating. Initially I was thinking of resuming my sweet drinks again as I do not feel sadness or regret as compared to potato chips. Ironically I read an article about sugar content and after checking the amount of sugar in each bottle, it becomes very easy to decide that I will stop the sweet drinks. Hahaha... Occasional treat during the weekends may be okay but I am definitely not tempted to have one bottle daily anymore. After all sugar is the number 1 enemy vs losing weight.

After all these food denial, the next thing that drives me crazy is: what is the point of living if I cannot enjoy my life? I cannot seem to lose weight despite eating only one proper meal so how would I able to squeeze in sinful food as one pleasure in life. I am not really a foodie but during this COVID time, there is nothing else that can really make me happy. Gaming does not give me as much joy as when I was younger and I am getting bored of watching dramas. My sleep time and slack time are often ruined by the fucking maid in the house. Bleah...

The only obvious benefit from restraining myself from all the junk food and food delivery is the money saved. Then again, what is the point of earning money if only to keep them in the bank? Having said that, the dividends for my POSB Invest Saver came in this week. Upon checking how much I have, I am considering to withdraw all and re-use that amount for investment with my financial consultant. The capital I have put in is not growing and it has been almost 6 years since I started. Based on the dividends alone, POSB Invest Saver gives around 3% return annually while the investment with my financial consultant is giving me about 10% per year. Of course 3% is better than normal deposit insurance and I do not regret because previously I cannot fork out a lump sum for the investment product. Now that I have enough for the lump sum, naturally I am inclined for the one with higher return. Aiya... see la.. thinking about money also makes me cranky.

Unsung Cinderella: Midori, The Hospital Pharmacist

Synopsis:

Midori Aoi is a passionate hospital pharmacist who goes the extra mile for her patients by understanding their lives in order to empower them with regards to their own medications and medical conditions.

My opinion:

Yep, my synopsis is just a sentence as this dorama basically depicts the daily life of a hospital pharmacist. As a drama, it is boring. Each episode follows the same formula and it is just a matter of different patients, diseases, medications as well various lifestyles or patients' circumstances which may affect their treatment. There is hardly an overarching plot and the supposedly climax of the drama with Seno's cancer treatment is so abruptly weird between episode 10 and the last episode 11. Character development is almost non-existent. Ironically, character development happens with the side characters namely Aihara (the newly practising pharmacist) and Onozuka (the jaded pharmacist who eventually rediscovers his passion). Of course, I may be biased because I am a pharmacist myself and thus I feel like watching my daily life on screen rather than watching a fictional series.

This dorama successfully covers many aspects of pharmacy: training, prescription intervention, packing and dispensing, medication error, narcotics/controlled drug audit, rude patients, rude doctors, nice patients, nice doctors, team-based care, different perception between retail vs hospital pharmacist, drug interactions, home care, waiting time, perpetually understaffed and very busy pharmacy, night shift, clinical trial, different types of pharmacists, robots, and many more.

Most of them are depicted quite realistically. However, I do have some criticisms. First is the imbalance between the nice and rude patients/doctors. Almost all the doctors and the patients here are rude but in reality the proportion of nice vs rude is not as imbalanced as what this dorama shows. Second is the unrealistically positive pharmacy environment. This will not happen in real life given the understaffing situation. They are also missing the slackers, the backstabbers and the MC fakers among the staff to add to the drama. Haha..

Nevertheless, I think they have done the best with what is available because unfortunately, most parts of pharmacy life is indeed boring. I mean how dramatic can we dramatise about reviewing prescriptions, packing drugs and dispensing which form majority of pharmacists' tasks. 

My afterthoughts:

Pharmacists are usually depicted in bad light in media e.g. misusing drugs from crimes so Unsung Cinderella is really a unique gem. Not only it does not put pharmacists in bad light, this is the first medical series which focuses on pharmacists. Usually medical series will have doctors as the main character. This dorama portrays the roles of pharmacists and life in a pharmacy quite realistically. It does not exaggerate the roles of pharmacists just because they are the main focus of the series. Those who find that the roles of pharmacists here being exaggerated are those who think that all pharmacists do is packing medicines. Yes, even helping to transfer patients in the emergency room is something that all medical professional can perform in a team-based care settings provided they are trained for it. Thus it is not an exaggeration.

After watching this, I conclude that pharmacy and pharmacist life is generally the same everywhere. Although I am heartened to watch this, it still does not inspire me to return to front line. Hehe.. I will just keep those memories in my heart.

By the way, the promotional image seems to be done much earlier before the shooting because the first guy from the left is not in the dorama. Haha.. I am not sure if that is meant to be Onozuka but he does not look like that in the actual dorama. Lastly, I am quite amazed that this is the first J-drama I watched and I posted in more than 4 years! Wew... My last one was for Tokyo DOGS in January 2017.