Ghost

Blood donation and diet do not go well together. I think I am still in the process of recovering since I have been feeling quite lousy from Sunday. My plan to keep spending for food in September to less than $200 is a failure now. I ordered Grab Food for dinner on Monday and yesterday because I felt weak on Monday and I was having headache since Tuesday evening. Yesterday was quite bad because I was avoiding taking medicines. I bought 2 packs of potato chips, 3 ice creams, and a bottle of milk tea in attempt to get rid of the headache but they did not work. That was why in the end I still ordered delivery for dinner. Luckily today I felt better and I went to gym again.

The headache and tiredness yesterday brought a very weird dream. For the very first time ever, I was a ghost in my dream. Haha.. It was like as if I was a ghost who could not pass on until a living couple helped to get my medical files. After knowing what happened to my health, I was satisfied but as I was about to say thank you to them, they could not longer sense my present. It was so random but there are 2 things I remembered very vividly from the medical files. First is a brief medical history of myself since I arrived in Singapore.  It was signed by an uncle who is a doctor but the funny thing is that I never consult him for any health problems in my life. Haha... Second is something to do about hernia. I saw multiple MRI images which made me finally realise where the lump was prior to my surgery last time. I remembered seeing black and white MRI images but I did not recall any details of the hernia itself la. Anyway it was so random and sadly I still woke up to reality of living. Bleah...

I was planning to do minor revision and addition to my Landings faith story although the usual recommendation is to re-write and not to re-use those done in the past since with time, the way I look at or feel about certain past things may no longer be the same. Looks like God does not wish to be naughty since apparently I do not have the old file. Huhuhu T_T I found a record in my 'sent' email but that was barely 1 page long. It seems that I typed halfway before sending it to my work email and to finish it at work. I printed it out last year but did not keep the completed digital copy. My weekend will be for this and my online photobook progress has to be put on hold again.

I seldom rant about work nowadays but this week I really get very irritated and upset with bitches at work. I am too lazy to type into the nonsensical and wasting time details but I think my work relationship with them is done for. I keep telling myself to exercise self-restrain and not to explode because perhaps I am just being a bit more sensitive due to my low energy. But honestly, I feel that what they have been doing is already undermining the spirit of teamwork and most importantly, my trust. Seriously these childish bitches should learn to think before saying irresponsible or useless things or making emotional decisions without thinking the long term consequences. In the future, they will complain again over their own stupid decisions done emotionally in the past. Really damn fucking stupid bitches.

For now I can only be thick skin as defense mechanism. Fiuuh... I am higher than them and I have more things to deal with. I simply do not have the time to deal with nitty gritty stuff that these lowly people are bitching about. Haiz.. I am really not looking forward to phase 3 since it means I have to see these bitches again. Can they please quit or something? Or I don't mind if I die so that I do not have to deal with them anymore.