No idea for title...

Wew... I did not what to say... I was so angry and cursing for few days. Until Friday came and I decided to attend evening mass (had RCIY after that anyway). The host really got rid of all the stones that burdened my heart. I don't know I guess it was a miracle. I was really furious before. So furious until even though I kept telling myself: "Just let it be! It's over! Cannot do anything! Still can do a lot and a lot of ccas to earn points" but my heart still ached. Praying was also futile, until that communion... I don't know.. I really cannot accept this. I did not deserve those f***ing ugly grades! That's why I was so disappointed... Well, it's all over now.. I hope those ugly feelings don't come back to me anymore..

I feel that my holiday here sucks than at home. There is nothing much to do here. But amazingly, out of that nothingness, I can write more stories here. Maybe it's because I REALLY have nothing to do that I can write a lot..

Hmm... I am done with Saint Seiya OVA Hades Chapter Inferno. I still have the Poseidon arc (watch it next time) and I shall wait until all the Hades Chapter Elysion to fully end in August/September before watching it. Hmm :) :) :) Love it... Then I am starting Spiral now. Only the first 2 episodes. I did not expect it to be a detective story.. Maybe it's to early to figure out the story line from the first 2 episodes. One yucky thing: the main guy character's ear is pierced. What the heck..

The site where I was getting FFVIII suddenly broke down.. What the hell... I only managed to obtain the first 2 discs... What happened? Sob sob...

I finally bought the manga of Kingdom Hearts: Chain of Memories. Until now did not have time to read. I am playing computer too much :'( I was so paiseh when I bought it. All who were crowding at the comics section were KIDS!!! I was thinking oh no... in Singapore manga/anime is really targetted to children.. But the scene totally different at the Toys and Comics Fair at Suntec Hall 603 which I attended yesterday. Mostly there were otakus... And yeah, they are teenagers... There were very few kids. I was expecting to spend there. That was not the case unfortunately. Bandai did not really sell a lot of things. But they had awesome display. I love those Saint Seiya figures!!! Gosh... I wish I am rich. I own a house and a cupboard and money to get the whole set!!! There was Chuang Yi stall with 10% off. But there was no Kingdom Hearts 2 mangas -_-... They sold old products.. I did not buy that because only the first 2 volumes are out... I will wait until the final volume is out then buy altogether. I hate waiting!

That brings me to tomorrow... I HATE WAITING!! I will wait and rot like crazy tomorrow during FOC. Just wait and wait and wait at my station. Oh well... All because of CCA points.. Haiz... Nonetheless, I am just a lazy bum! I am lazy to wake up in the morning, I am lazy to travel, I am lazy to pack things up, I DON'T want to stay over. Haha... Although staying over saves money and energy, I don't gave enough guts (read: I am not that thick-skinned) to do so. Haha... Not too close with the people. It will just be weird... Well never mind... Good luck to them and have fun :) I know they will. But I won't be... I am too concerned about not getting wet or dirty.. That's why I won't have fun :( I want... But I am too lazy to bring towel etc to shower. And I hate to do dirty laundry. Ew ew ew yucks...

For the closing, I shall share my highlight of the day: McDonalds' ONION RINGS!!! Try it!! It's nice.. It's $2.50. I only wish the portion is bigger though... I want more of nice stuff mah... Lol...
Spicy Chicken Nuggets is on my next waiting list... Lol

It was foolish to hope...
It was stupid to be ignorant before I hope...
It is already too late...
The list is out...
8 pts are gone...
Disappointment... Anger... Emptiness... Hopelessness...
That's all I am left with...
Regret?
No regrets...
There is nothing to regret...
I did no wrong...
I would know if I did...

Work harder...
Try harder...
Pray harder...
Don't quit...
Don't give up...
Don't think these all matter to me know...
I am just too tired...
To try...
To fail...
And to be disappointed...

Where is luck?
Where is God?

Busy busy busy...

Wuih.. I had been very busy for the past few days.. And I will still be busy in the incoming few days. Busy in the sense that I have to do some things outdoor. Not busy slacking as what I do usually.

On Friday, it was RCIY again. It was a talk combined with the whole youth groups in the church. So I did not really get to know the new people. Anyway I was to shy to introduce myself and ask the names of the 2 people who came early. Haha... After the session, we went to have ice cream at Udders. Wew... I was planning to cut down my food expenses, in the end I spend $5 for ice cream. Yahz, it was my dinner (as I had a free dinner at the church). I ordered double scoop of Mao Shan Wang (a type of durian which is even better than D24) and Cempedak flavours. COOL!!!! They ROCKed!!! The flavours are really authentic! Worth the money. Played taboo while eating and lucky that I saw my watch when it was 2330. I was almost late for the last bus. Whew... Was scared that PGP back gate was already closed but lucky that was not the case :)

I dreaded going to the Pre-WYD event yesterday. I knew nobody. Thank God that I came (though I had to drag my butt) as it was the first time I got to know my group mates. Not a terrible group I suppose. I am sincerely hoping it will be a good and enjoyable trip there. Went back late again. I was thinking that I would sleep early and attend the 830 mass today. But it failed. Lol... Woke up at 10 in the end. I was busy getting Saint Seiya Poseidon and Hades chapters that I do not have at home. I was also getting the cool song which becomes my blog's OST now. Haha... Nice song :) It's the opening of Saint Seiya Hades ~ Inferno and Elysium.

I went to donate blood at HSA for the first time today. It was good! Funny seat.. So high and I did not know how to get on it.. Later I found out that the hand rest can be moved... 0_0 The refreshing was great! That is for sure. Better than at school. Haha..

So what am I busy right now? I am reading Harry Potter and the Deathly Hallows. Yeah! Only until chapter 17 now. I have to rest well tonite. Tomorrow it will be another long day.. and a tiring one for sure. Haha..

End of Holidays

I am back in Singapore since yesterday. Although school has not started yet, I don't feel that it is still holiday season. I am not at home and I don't feel at home, that's why. 1 month out of 3 at home is way too short. Well, I cannot help it. I need to hunt for points and prepare to go to Sydney.

It was very tiring yesterday. I cleaned up my whole room. I think the management office did not attend to my request. What was shocking was my room is dirtier than my friend's room. My friend did not go home so his room is full of stuff and he has been away for 3 weeks. The cleaner did not clean his room. So how the hell that my room which is supposed to be cleaned after I left can be dirtier. Haiz.. Well, I hate packing and unpacking so I will surely complain.

I injured my right biceps. I think It was too tiring to carry a big box (it was light leh!) from one end to the other end of PGP. Haiz... Felt like trash yesterday but after I had a good 10hours of sleep, it feels better now, though it still hurts.

Holiday at home was not very fruitful. I only managed to complete the sanctuary chapter of Saint Seiya. Gaming wise, I could not even complete the stats for Vanguard Bandits. Haiiz... Well, better try next time. Hahaha...

After coming back here, I played a bit of online games yesterday. Now I find that 9Dragons is more fun than Cabal. I think because there is more variety in the quests (instead of killing how many of different enemies), nicer character clothes, and less crowded. Hahaha... But still, both do not up to the standard of an RPG game with a storyline. Lol.

I want to get ISO but I forgot where I got it last time. That's the bad side of keeping the history short in my computer. Haiz.. But I guess that can wait because I have not played Suikoden II and Tales of Destiny (in the ISO form). I have not even continued my Persona.

Ok it's shopping time now. I need to get memory card for my HP. I need to look for new anime goods. And hopefully the book I am aiming for is available in Kinokuniya. Hopefully the last Harry Potter book has become less than $10.

So short...

Uaah... This holiday is so short... I only have about 1 week plus here at home. And there are still so many things that I want to do :'(

Some of my achievements during this holiday are sulking and despairing over the big big exam failure, finishing White Snake Legend (whooping 50 episodes although the last half I watched with x4 speed... boring..), and getting some personal photos :) Those are all! Chinese books are just sitting at the corner. I have absolutely no mood to read them after the ghastly Chinese I grade. Haiz... My plan of refreshing driving will likely be a failure. I just have no mood. I am just worried about my shopping plan for clothings and trying to recover from my sadness.. And I am looking forward to my photos this incoming weekend. Yeah... It's been more than 5 years since I had one. Hahaha... And I shall see how much of Saint Seiya I can watch. I am still at episode 10 now.

Ah ya, finally Barack Obama won the presidential nomination of the Democratic Party. I am still hoping for Hillary Clinton. Hopefully she can be the Vice President :)

Anguish

I opened my old anime magazines to find out an anime book I want to buy. It is unfortunate that I only realised it now, 9 years after the book was published. How could I not remember about it when the first time I went to Singapore? By that time, I am sure that the book would still be available. I tried to check on Kinokuniya web book search. The book is still in the catalogue but when I asked, the shop had no stock. The supplier also had no stock. That means I have no way to get it at all. Except by searching it in Japan perhaps.

Exam results were out and I am deeply shocked, saddened, and disappointed. Even up to know T_T... I have nothing to blame because I don't think I had a lousy preparation... It was due to factors due to the exams. :( I guess that's the punishment for being over-confident, proud, arrogant, and over-expecting in the hope of repeating what I did 6 months ago. I will go next time with a new mindset that I am indeed dumb and I shall not put up so high expectation.

It's a terrible experience. I never feel this low. My faith is also taking a huge stepback... How can I go to Sydney with this kind of faith?

Booo....

Yeah... tomorrow I am flying off. Yay yay yay! It was quite good spend the last week alone in my corridor. I wish that happens all the time. The toilet is clean, the kitchen is perfect, the rubbish bin is empty, and there is space for me in the fridge (I mean for me to put stuff... not for me to fit into the the fridge!).

I always dread packing... So tiring and stressful... I hate that people order me to buy this buy that like shit. It is just wasting my time, my money, and stresses me while I am packing. I see my friends who are flying off, they have much less stuff as compared to me. It must be because they don't have people ordering them to buy so many stuff. Haiz...

I am constantly feeling lethargic. I have been sleeping over 2 AM for this week. I have been playing Cabal. Yeah, I have nothing better to do I guess.. No online game at home but I really wish my facebook games are playable :) :)

The American Idol has come to the final next week. I watched this week episode from Youtube as I was waiting for hours to get my 9dragons uploaded few days ago. 1 song I like and is very interesting because there is BOO! Lol... I really do not expect that BOO is such a famous expression lol...

I think instead of "With You", the title should be "My Boo". Lol.. Nice song though...


I thought my ears were bluffing me so this is the original version (the music) with the text... It IS really BOO. Lol...


Oops.. almost missed this funny thing. It is quite a long video. Fantasia is so scary but the thing I want to point out is Simon's expression at the end of the Fantasia's singing!!! Lol...

Ok.. I shall have my dinner now and faster pack as much as I can... I am falling sick (my nose suddenly bled on the bus today... I think someone saw -_-). I hope I don't die... Haiz...

HAPPY HOLIDAYS!!!

Hmm...

After exam, we had a photo taking session. From Friday - Sunday, I had a retreat with ICy at the Saint Theresa's Church. Considering how ugly my hair already is, I was very surprised to see that I looked quite decent in the photos taken on both occasions. Hehehe... Lucky!!!

The retreat went much better than I expected and I hoped. I had fun and I had my first confession. Gosh.. I just love my faith. I never expected that the penance would be so light. I expected something along the line of 1 week of rosary or something. No, it is much lighter and the priest's advice was also so good. No judgement or condemnation. I was really touched.

This semester had been so busy that only on Wednesday was the very first American Idol (of this season) that I watched. Apparently the previous episode created a lot of hoo-hah on whether the show is scripted. Here is the video:

Poor Paula. I think she got a lot of bashing up after that. Oh well, I still love her and I still enjoy this show especially the judges' comments (as compared to so many Idols versions that I have watched).

So now my main activity is gaming. Some games that I am playing are from Facebook. Heroes is getting boring as it takes forever to level up. But I am glad that I find Battle Stations. It is much more enjoyable and it has prettier graphics. Yay... Cabal takes forever to level up so I just play it for fun...

I feel so dead and unmotivated as I really have nothing to do and to look forward to...

And I feel very lonely...

LAC1201: Chinese 1; LSM1401: Fundamentals of Biochemistry; PY1106: Physiology II; GEK1001: Place, Environment, and Society; PR1103: Pharmacy Practice

Recap of the papers, in order of appearance:

LAC 1201 - Chinese 1
This was long long ago. I may forget the code number also. Anyway, I believe this would be my best score. Lol... It was not so simple but so lucky that I got 85. I expected to get 90 though. There was one additional mistake that I do not know why until now. The other 2 mistakes were already expected even from during the exam. Yah... that's my ppor luck in doing MCQs. Always tikam the wrong ones.. When I changed answer, the original answer was the correct one. When I did not change, the one I wanted to change to became the correct one. Darn... I just hope this module can get A... Please...

LSM 1401 - Fundamentals of Biochemistry
Sucks... My summary sheet was completely USELESS (as in I did not even use it!). I only opened the book to check for the amino acid structures. I was shocked because I could not even finish shading. I did not see any clock at the hall and the teacher acted so strict. Haiz... Nevermind... To my horror, when I checked what those question I had no time to shade, there were few that I did not even look/read/think the questions at all. Some of the questions were too wordy. And my biggest disappointment is that I spent quite some time doing the 2 cancelled question. What the hell... This is bad but I hope there are sufficient people to do worse than me.

PY 1106 - Physiology II
Finally, it is the last of it! (I even forgot how to spell it and misspelt it to pyshiology). It was as bad as the last sem final exam. I felt better though (I guess it is immunity). I am hoping that my grade is the same as last time.

GEK 1001 - Place, Environment, and Society
Sucks sucks sucks... If I can get an S, I have nothing to complain already

PR 1103 - Pharmacy Practice
The last paper and it is the WORST for me. It is the worst in the sense that it left a very bitter aftertaste. I could not finish. I had no idea about what to write regarding the counselling question. Haiz... Did not even have the time to check the calculations. In short, I have no confidence in this one. I am praying for miracles.

Believe or not, this is actually my first exam time that I did not experience any stress. Yahz, so perhaps it is true that the Spirit and God's grace do exist. Wowowowow!!! I mean I have known myself for 21 years and there was no single exam period (no matter how confident and how well prepared I am) when I did not feel any little pang of stress at all. Gosh... The feeling does help. I think I am already quite helpless and tired of studying.

Oh yeah!!! I was so sad and angry today. But the moment I went shopping (though I did not buy things for myself), I immediately felt happier. Gosh.... I become a girl already... Spent $400 today. I wanted to cry already. Airfare costs $100 than the last time I bought (and the last time was december-january which should be a high season, I believe). The fuel charge increased (expected) and there is an additional administration fee of $30. What the heck... Haiz... and S$ keeps increasing... Hostel bill also came. Not the full vacation but it amounted to $400 already. I will go bankrupt soon... The bill is not a full bill yet. I believe the last 2 weeks of vacation will use the new hostel rate already. If my scholarship allowance does not increase, that's the end of me T_T

Haiz... I am tired... I shall prepare to sleep now :)

Happy 21st Birthday!!!

HAPPY BIRTHDAY TO ME...
HAPPY BIRTHDAY TO ME...
HAPPY BIRTHDAY...
TO MYSELF...
HAPPY BIRTHDAY.... TO ME!!!!

HAPPY 21ST BDAY!!!!

Yeah I am 21 today!!! I am no longer a kid, but I am still young at heart! I hope that all the bad things associated with teenagers are gone from me, mainly: pimples. Haha... This is the first time that I have repeated celebrations for a birthday. That means 1 thing: gaining weight!!!

Fish & Co (i don't like cocktail!)
Cafe Cartel (nice pork ribs!)
Kuishi-Bo (very very good!!!! i don't even need a dinner tonight. Haha... I don't even stuff myself until I want to vomit this afternoon)

There are a lot of things to say actually, but I don't have any time. Must study.

So...

MUGGING CONTINUES.....