Sunday, April 4, 2010

Happy Easter 2010!!

Time passes so quickly and looking back, this year has been much better than last year. I read my past year blog entries to check what I wrote last Easter. There was none actually lol.. Last year was a crazy busy semester and all my entries around this period was oh-well.. full of flames, profanities, and vulgarities. I am very very glad that this year is much smoother for me :) There are still stress due to school work and CCA of course, but last year was definitely much worse. Or is it because I experienced it last year that this year's sufferings feel more bearable? Lol..

It was not raining this Good Friday! OMG!! Maybe next year will be the end of the year! It has always been raining on Good Friday for as long as I remember.. Anyway, this year, it was a Bad Friday for me (not because of the rain thing). Last year I went to St Teresa for Good Friday and the Way of the Cross there was good. The words of the prayers were more suitable for current era. So this year I intended on trying Holy Cross. Due to PK lab, unfortunately, I missed out the 730, 1000, and 1230 service.. Sigh.. I did not want to go for the 1500 service because the Way of the Cross would be after the service and I certainly would be lazy. So I went to St Teresa again, hoping for the same good experience like last year.

It turned out to be the contrast. At the slope, I was almost bang-ed by a car. It was a very very gentle slope and there was a small jam. I decided to cross to the side of the church behind a car. And instead of going forward, this car rolled backward. OMG!!! I know I was THAAAT BIG that the driver could not see that behind him there was another car. So even if he didn't hit me, he would hit the other car. Bleah.. I was half asleep and I managed to avoid the car with a very unglam pose -_- The people in the car behind me confirmed laugh lor -_-.. Anyway I was tempted to kick the booty of the car and spew vulgarities but then hey.. I was at a church.. must have certain self-restraint.. at least I managed to dodge the car.

I could not concentrate inside the churche because the person next to me was suffocating. Haiz.. Maybe he didn't brush teeth or something.. Everytime he opened his mouth to sing or say prayers, the sickening aroma was emited. I hardly could concentrate. Bleah.. Anyway, I was surprised that there were actually Holy Communion in a Good Friday service.. I never remember there was one o_0 I thought everything would end after the veneration.. And last year I was attending one at that same church.. Last year must be very very bad period for me (refer to the first paragraph) lol..

I decided to try out the Easter Vigil at Holy Cross yesterday. Sigh I regretted it. I should have just stayed in my habit of going to Risen Christ. I shall not compare which is nicer etc. I just feel that the one at Risen Christ allowed me to experience God more.. At Holy Cross, the Service of Light was done outside. The bad thing about it is: 1) we hardly could see what was happening 2) it was so hot humid sweaty 3) after that we had to fight for entrance to the church (everyone was chionging for seat!). Totaly defeats the purporse of me -_- There was 7 readings (omg!) but there was nothing much to complain there. My biggest disappointment was at the baptism part. I find it more meaningful if before the Renewal of Baptismal promise, the congregation received the candles from the newly baptised, rather than from the wardens.. And during baptism, the choir was singing. To me, it would be nicer if we could here who were the people getting baptised, after all it was like welcoming new members to the family, so how can we do that if we don't even know who they are? Well, at least it was a new experience to me.. to see how different churches do things differently.

I read an interesting article from Catholic News. It has been a few months since the last time I managed to snatch for a copy. Lol.. Anyway the write up was about crucifixion. The writer explores the humiliation of crucifixion. He explores the idea that when Jesus prayed for the Father to take the cup away, He feared the humiliation more than the physical agony. Apparently, when someone is crucified, the person is completely naked (OMG!). Yup those loincloth in the pictures are just to make the pictures more 'decent'. Then the article also says that when the person dies, the bowel will loosen. That means it would be raining shit.. o_0 So gross.. I thought these are exaggeration by a Catholic newspaper so I checked wiki.. Wiki says the same things and I found even more gross things like: people can be hung there for hours and day so if they need to pee then they just pee there o_0.. Ouch.. I am totally grossed out.. my head is aching and I feel like vomiting..

Well, the gross feeling aside, it just makes me more amazed with God saving plans.. It's really unbelievable that a God would come down from heaven, to be in the midst of His filthy creatures, and to die in the most disgusting way humans can ever think of.. I am only a 3 year old baby catholic and I still have much more to learn in my journey of faith. Perhaps this can make me think on what are really important for me and in my life. Like the cliche being mentioned at every Good Friday, it's time for me to think "what is so valuable in me that God would suffer and die for me?". I have gone astray to far.. but it is never too late to turn back.. Though the soul is willing, the flesh is weak.. and really, what I need is to pray more.. something I have totally neglected in the past few months.. haiz... back to square zero again =(

For God so loved the world that he gave his only Son (Jn 3:16)

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